I have always been naturally curious, probably too curious. When I was a child, my mom told me Santa was not real because I kept asking so many questions that she got exacerbated and finally just said he is not real. Unfortunately, this has come at a cost. I cannot see the world the way that I used to. I used to look at the world altruistically with rose colored glasses and I simply cannot do that anymore. I know too much. In 2023, I was deemed the female Andrew Tate. I had one of the largest podcasts in the United States and was loved and hated by many. My opinions seem extreme to the average person and I could see why. As I stared down the bright lights with one of the biggest interviewers in the United States asking how I came to such absurd opinions....I thought to myself....you have no idea.....
Flashback to 2020
I was a 22 year old young woman who was pretty naive when it came to the world. I had attended small private schools my entire life and I had started a small YouTube channel. I have always loved media and seeing the unscripted sides of people, but I was not sure what my niche was or what I wanted to do. Covid was in full swing and it felt like the world was changing in a way that was never going back. I was unI had quit my job to play volleyball in England just to have my season cancelled, so I decided to give it a go as a YouTuber. One day I found a video of a pick up artist. These are men that teach seduction. It reminded me of sales to some degree, but also included social skills that my chronically online generation needed. Millenials are an interesting group because we had a generational gap. Our parents got married young and stayed together for life. They did not have to deal with or did not knowingly have to deal with infidelity, hook ups, and one night stands. We are a generation of people lost when it comes to sex and relationships. Our parents told us to wait till marriage to have sex, but how does one wait till marriage in the modern day when no one is getting together till 30?
I reached out to one of the pick up artists and he invited me to do a boot camp. this one of my first YouTube videos. I went to a PUA bootcamp.
I hopped on the plane and went to Vegas to meet the instructors and the students. The bootcamp took place in hotel rooms where the instructors gave the young men insights on how to be attractive to women and then took them to malls, clubs, and bars and instructed them to approach the young women. If you look online, they call these men creepy and weird but that was not my experience. Most of the men were normal young men that were maybe a little socially awkward and the instructors were charming good looking guys teaching them the way. What is wrong with that and why are these guys so demonized?
I learned a few things at these camps
Observation 1 - Fat Women Rejected Average Men
Upon my research for the camp, I had stumbled across the idea that average women were rejecting average men. My initial thought was that not all women are like that. We are not that superficial and shallow right? However, now that I thought more about it....it did kind of make sense with what I had seen in the world. Every guy I had dated was off the bat above average height. I am 6 foot tall and had no idea only 15% of men were that height. I had no idea how above average my boyfriend at the time was....I had never thought about it....on top of that I was about 20-35 lbs overweight at the time. athletic but chubby athletic....
However, this pick up boot camp really put that reality in my face. As the men approached women, I could not help but notice that below average women were rejecting the men and at times harshly. I remember one woman in particular probably being 50 lbs overweight and snickering at one of the young men who approached her. Being that I was part of the group I was attempting to help the men get laid and I could not believe how incredibly difficult it was. Some of the men were a bit awkward but none were ugly.....I still witnessed rejection after rejection after rejection and some of the women were SO mean. Not only that, some of the women rejecting them were quite literally fat.
I remember in particular one overweight black woman brutally rejecting a 5'10 average build white guy - the audacity.
Observation 2 - Women Are Fucking the Same Men
One of the pick up artists was particularly smooth and good looking. I had actually never seen a guy that was such a natural with women. Pretty much every approach he at least had the girls laughing and smiling. He was one of the guys that women just loved no matter how he treated them- you could just tell. I am going to call him Hercules because he sort of looked like that character. Good looking, in shape, what my generation would call chad.
I witnessed Hercules take home 3 women in a weekend. Look, I am not going to pretend I was some innocent young woman who had never seen people hook up, but to this level? to this extreme? I had never in my life seem a guy take home three women in 2 days....do the math ...if he goes out every weekend...that is 156 girls a year. Two of the women were in the same day. Holy crap....we really are all fucking the same men.
It suddenly made my entire life make sense. I remember in college having the thought that there was always one guy that most women on my team could not get over....one guy that women would go back to for each girl and now that I think about it. Yes, it absolutely was the players. It absolutely was the guys that either learned this stuff or maybe naturally knew it....it was like magic.
Observation 3 - some men wanted to sleep around but a lot wanted a girlfriend and wife
The media labeled these men are mysogenistic, sexist, and predatory. In fact, if I google it. Ai says Pick-up artists (PUAs), also known as the "seduction community," are predominantly groups of men who use studied, structured, and psychological strategies to approach, attract, and seduce women. While sometimes framed as self-improvement, the industry is widely criticized for being manipulative, sexist, and predatory. Society makes it seem like these men just want to prey on women but from my observations it was the opposite.
Again, sure yes some of the guys like the instructor that looked like Hercules did run through a lot of women. Yes a chunk of them wanted to join that crew, but lots of these guys really did want to have a wife and kids. But these women were willing, enthusiastic participants who did not ask about dating him before sex. Most of the guys there seemed to want something more stable and long term when I really talked to them, but this was just a meant to get there.
Observation 4 - Monogamy is not in the card for some guys
It was interesting talking to Mr. Hercules about sex. To be honest, over the years I have met many men similar to him in terms of ability to get women. He seemed to think he wanted to get married someday, but he really did not seem to have the desire to settle down. How does a guy go from 100 women a year for over a decade to one woman for life. The other thing for us ladies to know is that sometimes a mans inability to commit to you has nothing to do with anything in your control. you are below his attraction floor or he just is not the type to commit to anyone ever.
I may add more observations from this weekend but I will keep it at that for now. thanks for reading my first article. Forgive me as I am still honing in my writing skills. love you all.
